Mittwoch, 17. August 2011

Changes..... in my life.....





Wow - sometimes we need a little time to recognize that we haven' t recognized.......
Exactly one year and one week ago my whole life changed totally - my usual world turned upside down with the arrival of the little (now grown grown grown :)) fourleged Max and Ben.  For those who know me and as told several times the first time was one of the toughest times I had to go through and even the dogs are now 1 year and 3 months old they still keep me busy the whole day.
And with all the doings during the time I didn' t recognized that my "me and myself " disappeared slowly but constantly. And a few weeks ago I woke up and felt myself so so so "burned out" - I never had this feeling before. I was tired from going up - was tired from having a cup of coffee - sometimes I couldn't even imagine putting on my shoes and go for a walk with the dogs. I sat in front of my computer and didn't know what to do - what to write, what to read, what to check...... and time flew by sooo fast.
My whole day was just "the dogs need to be walked, to be feed, to be entertained, to be educated. to be loved, to be pampered, to be.... to be......
I took photos which I immediately deleted when I checked them as I thought - what the hell is that? I didn't even had any interest in my normally so beloved photography..... I did some shootings because I was asked but never had the fun I had years before. And believe me or not - I see the difference of photos which are taken because they have to be taken and photos which are taken with fun and love and the right view....
So last weekend when I sat in my comfy sunbed and had a book in front of my nose I put this book away and thought about my life and that its bitterly needed to make a change.
With all my love to Max and Ben I first have to think that those two "banditos" are "just" dogs - and they have each other. Noo need to be around them 24 hours a day.
Does it surprise you that all in all I spend around 5 hours a day with/for them? Summarize these hours and we have 25 hours per working week. That means that my week "lost" more than two working days.
So I won't make a cut in that way that I will leave them alone the whole day but I found out that I have to do a plan for my days and that every day needs a few hours for me and myself.
So here I will walk in my new/old  life step by step again.... with
 - going up in the morning with my first cup of coffee
 - walking the dogs for an hour
 - having a healthy breakfast 
 - putting on my running shoes and doing a run for 5, 7.5 or 10 kms
 - taking a shower and taking a seat in front of my computer
 - doing some proper and needed work
 - walking the dogs in the afternoon for 1,5 hours
 - grabbing my cam and doing some photos
 - having dinner with hubby 
 - and last but not least going to bed way earlier!!!!!!

There will be days I cannot live this plan but that should become routine again - for sure when there are some photoshootings ( and there are quite a lot upcoming shootings) I have to change a little.
I want to find my "old me" again - I want to have fun again and not being "depressed" by thinking about all the things I wasn't able to do the whole day - I want to be that "Kerstin" I was before....so what do you think about that all?????


Cheers to my new(old) life - welcome back again.